I'll bet he's flyin' high.

"Is the Fiscal Times a Putin moth piece?" 

Ouch!

"I think I have pink eye."

"It looks more like drink eye to me."

Be sure to cook it long enough

"I'm going to have a cd dinner tonight."

Under the sea?

"They can go where the sub don't shine."

Almost as bad as my socks!

"You've got a stink on you that'd make a shrimp sick."