Saturday, December 19, 2015

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Thursday, December 10, 2015

Saturday, November 14, 2015

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

I'll grant you that.


Teacher: "These were easy questions. Like who's buried in Grant's tomb."
Student: "You mean Cary Grant?" 

Monday, September 21, 2015

Friday, September 18, 2015

What a pest


"It's a real annoying dog...sort of a cross between
a beagle and a mosquito."

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Oh those crazy Frogs!


"They were playing 'Mayonnaise', you know, the French National Anthem."

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Misheard lyrics


A woman once called Randy Bachman to tell him how
much she like his song "Bacon-carrot biscuits."
("Taking Care of Business")

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Good thing, that.


"If the Red Sea parted and closed back up as slowly
as these elevator doors, we'd all be Egyptians today."

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Thursday, June 25, 2015

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Sounds good to me


"I'm trying to lower my blood pressure with red wine and chocolate."

Saturday, June 20, 2015

I know the type


"You can sum her personality up in two words, 'Un' and 'Pleasant'". 

Sunday, May 24, 2015

Fork it over.


"It is just the last fork, not the ball that got it all rolling."

Friday, May 22, 2015

Sunday, May 3, 2015

Thursday, April 30, 2015