What I just heard
Friday, January 31, 2014
If this is what you mean, sign me up!
From an internet job board:
"We are onboarding this week, please contact us as soon as possible to apply!"
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Go for it!
Overheard in a bar
"Miss, this wine is awful!"
"No problem, I'll get you another one."
"Wait, can I have another sip before you take it?"
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Tough life
"It must be rough working one day in a row."
Thursday, January 9, 2014
I'll bet that was rough on the throat!
"Today, I downed two North Face jackets, two pairs of snow pants,
skydiving googles, and the warmest gloves I could find."
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Yeah, but how many pounds can it press?
"Wow! That's the Jack Lalanne of chickens."
Sunday, January 5, 2014
Must be a new fangled appliance
"I have a confection oven so it cooks real fast."
Friday, January 3, 2014
What time are you serving?
Overheard on New Year's Eve at an ice cream parlor:
"I need three gallons of vanilla ice cream. My dinner's pretty lousy so we're making a bunch of
hummers and hopeful no one will notice."
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